Saturday, October 2, 2010

Making money the easy way.

Aside from “Deal or no Deal?”, another well known phrase is “Have you bought your Lotto ticket?” And have you? How many South Africans are suddenly going to become instant millionaires? Are we still wary of it?
For research purposes, I raided the petty cash box, bought a ticket and waited for the draw.
Up until now my interest in the Lotto has been merely academic, meaning I had not bought a ticket and therefore I was allowed to criticise the whole event. Now things had changed…. I was a PARTICIPANT!
But becoming a participant is more than just buying a ticket. Picking any 6 numbers at RANDOM is like drinking Chivas with Coke! I had to have a system. Not just any system, mind you, but the winning one. A foolproof system that no other person on the planet had thought of before, the only one that was guaranteed to remove all competition and leave me as the outright winner of the jackpot. Well that was the foundation of my system. Me and millions of other players. No matter how you pick your numbers, and believe me I tried several rather strange combinations, someone has thought of it before. Ask your friends about their “personal” systems and you will find that most of them are similar. BUT, and it’s a BIG but, lets assume that you have devised that winning system, which I thought I had. You also have to pick the correct day to buy your ticket. Once again I had choices. Life would be so uncomplicated if choices were taken away from us.
So, I choose the correct day, I have the winning system for picking numbers and most importantly I have bought that ticket. Now the waiting has started, and with the waiting the indecision. Have I used the correct system? Should I buy more tickets using another system? Just in case, you understand... The first system is still the winning combination, but a back-up plan never hurts. So I buy several more tickets using variations of the original system. Time is running out and the draw is getting closer.
And like a condemned man after his final meal, I wait.
Saturday morning…only a few hours to wait…I suddenly decide that using my car engine number was not such a good idea. Is there time to change or will that be tempting fate? Should I have used the bar code number on the can of tuna that has been in my fridge for the last two months or should I use the number on my dry cleaning slip?
Sweating, I wait it out.
I only have to survive to first half of “Like Mike” in order to reap the benefit of my infallible system.
The show drags on, but finally…it’s time for MY BIG MOMENT!
I can hear the press knocking at my door. I can feel the heat of the studio lights as T.V interviewers ask me about the system that I used…
The machine starts, I am focussed…
The first number is 5. YES, MY SYSTEM IS WORKING.
The second number is 3. Still the system works for me.
I have a new house, a new car, I AM RICH!
Third number, 7. OH YES, still HOT!
Next number, 23, is not one of mine! Reality sets in.
No more numbers, the system has failed. Crashed and burned.like so many others around the country.
How will I face my colleagues on Monday?
More importantly will I be able to retrieve that letter of resignation that I slipped under my boss’s door on Friday. Hopefully he won’t understand some of the medical terminology that I used…
Oh well, with the R20.00 I’ve won I can always buy some cardboard for a sign…

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